Calling All Men

Anyone out there a father, husband, or considering becoming one of the aforementioned? This is for you! A few months ago I was meeting with a group of guys and we were discussing what it looks like to balance our relationship with God and our busy work and home lives. I ran across my notes from that session and thought they could be a good conversation starter for other men who had similar concerns about these aspects of life. 

To start, God calls us to “seek first His kingdom” in Matthew 6:33 and in doing so, He will provide all of our necessities. Does this mean we don’t have to work? No, simply that there is no need to worry about these things. If we are seeking after what God has for us, the job or other means we need to have food, clothing, and shelter will be given. Placing highest priority on God, and His plans for us, frees us to do effective work. I believe this is the overarching principal to filter the rest of our activities and responsibilities through.

To balance all aspects of life, one must start with God. Discovering His plan for you and walking with Him will put work and family into perspective. Relying on Him to provide and working as though He is your boss puts you into a position to work an appropriate amount of time without going overboard. It seems to me that most overtime and overexertion at work is the result of chasing after worldly goals not Godly pursuits. If we can follow God’s lead with how much of our day should be at work, then the remaining time should be family time. Though it appears that I’m saying “give the family the leftovers”, this is not the case. As a husband and father, my priority is to be the vessel by which they receive their provision. If I am truly allowing God to lead, He will allow plenty of time at home. I reached this conclusion by looking at the situation from the opposite end. How can I quantify how much time I need to spend at home? Ideally, I would not work at all and spend time with my family. This is not my calling. I think that it is most effective to let God determine how much time the house needs by providing enough work rather than too much. Finally, if I need to be a good manager of my household, I need to be purposeful when I am there. Yes, it is where there is relaxation, but their must also be an atmosphere of love, teaching, and discipline that is soil for the growing children and refreshment for the wife. If I have enough time to instill these characteristics and values in my home, then my balance should be good, even if I am working full time. As with everything, it all comes down to following God first. Much of this balance problem is the result of chasing the wrong things. If I want what is truly best for my family, work will not be all consuming. 

My favorite example of man’s responsibility comes from I Timothy 3 ”A man should manage his own household well, keeping his children under control with all dignity”…”good managers of their children and their own households”. Clearly, work is not everything. If too much time is spent at work, how can one develop the rapport and relationship necessary to effectively lead his wife and children? Trust me; this is all easier said than done. This is an ongoing process within me and my family, but I know that this is a task that I cannot afford to fail at. I challenge all you men to seek God’s will and continually strive to successfully fulfill the role He has placed you in. 

By C. Sampson